Getting Back into the Swing of Things

I have just returned from a two-week long trip to Pennsylvania, which is the location of the Pennsic Wars, an SCA event I participate in. It was really great to see my friends, but the whole event for me was work, work, work! By the time all my obligations were finished, it was time to leave. I had some good days, enjoying the company of my friends, but a painful injury made the latter parts of the war nearly unbearable for me. I’m still quite lame, but I’m getting better, I suppose. Though I hurt a lot, I’m trying to get back to work on some stuff I have coming up. There is a review for Infinite Variations, that I must finish…but the biggest thing is that I have just decided I am going to go through with my application for the Doctoral Program at FSU. While I have had teachers tell me before that I am a natural for the PhD program, I’m still worried. What if I fail? What if I don’t get in? I’ve been dealing with quite a bit of personal failure these days, and I don’t want to have to worry about what to do next if I don’t make it into the program. All that is some scary shit. I know I have a reputation for being quite tough when it comes to dealing with stress, but I am worried all the same. I guess I’ll just have to do what I always do and take things one step at a time. There have been some promising remarks on my writing samples, and even though I probably won’t write the Arqiyyon as my creative dissertation option (scholars don’t usually feel kindly towards genre), I still want to write a novel to get my PhD. I have two ideas that I’m working on, each more “literary” than the Arqiyyon, but who knows what’s going to happen next? I have already asked for several letters of recommendation and gotten some professors interested. I am scheduled to take the GRE next, which means I’ll have to study my little butt off to prepare. I’m going to start that tomorrow. At least I don’t have to walk anywhere to prepare for the GRE. Wish me luck! I’m going to need it!

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~ by ImaginaryCanary on August 14, 2012.

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